be inspired by taking care of yourself
One of the most supportive things we can do for ourselves is to open to receiving what we want, need and deserve. We are often good at giving but struggle with allowing ourselves to get what we need.
One of the most supportive things we can do for ourselves is to open to receiving what we want, need and deserve. We are often good at giving but struggle with allowing ourselves to get what we need.
There are mornings that the best thing to do is to remember all the things I am grateful for.
Be gentle as you gain the confidences to accept from others. I tend to be a giving; seeing what others need and wanting to step in.
2003, Holmdel, New Jersey - raining during a maternity session
I am not sure if this was just a my nature tor that I was raise as the middle daughter with four brothers and three sister. Growing up I was asked help, to give up thing I had to bring calmness such as my doll to a a sibling crying. I babysat at home, for neighbors, trying to be what they all needed me to be. Still at 59, I need to remind myself about my needs and that it is okay to take care of them first.
My office in the winter is in one the upstairs bedroom in the house I turned into my office, studio and gallery. This house is mine, one that I had once held many dreams. The year after I purchased the house, SuperStorm Sandy ruined it. Initially after the storm I tried so hard to repair and complete it but, it took way longer than I thought. During the time, life changed, as it always does. Now the house is home to my workspace. This is taking care of what I need at this time… a peaceful beautiful place to create in.
From my desk, I can see the Barnegat Bay in Point Plesant, NJ and the Mantoloking Bridge. This morning it s dreary outside, raining mist, cold with a fog softening the bridge view. There a telephone poles and power line but what I see it the beauty.
Is this ‘rose colored glasses?’
I have often heard that I need to be ‘realistic.’ My dreams, my hopes even my business has been part of those criticism.
2017 Point Pleasant underwater mother and daughter
“All the time you spend on taking pictures, on the computer, on marketing it - you could make more doing something else.”
Or
“You charge too much for your work, I cannot afford your services.”
These comments hurt in the past yet they only came from those who did not understand. Possibly it was also I did n to understand either. It takes a knowledge of yourself as an artist to see your value and to know this value will be
2012, Bay Head, NJ family portraits
My work is for those who do, my life is about seeing past the ugly and finding the beauty. This is living a joyful, inspired life to me.The spent years developing my skills, has been important to the development, giving art the time. I understand when working with others what time we need to create and then charge accordingly.
One of the important aspects to my life is spending more of my time seeing beauty.
My work is always evolving, there are certainly certain themes
preparing to start - inspired - artist, photographer, doula
“and suddenly you know: it is time to start somethings new and trust the magic of BEGINNINGS”
What do you feel you are on the verge of…… write it down
Milk Bath scroll album - all I could think about was the ethereal beauty in the milk bath
January is quickly moving by, changes are in the air
addition of Milk Bath portraits
plus becoming certified as a ProDoula
Change is growth and we never know for sure where it will lead us.
Readjustments in my business this year…
In April, the decision was made to remotely have my wonderful friend, artist Elsa Mikus Tempest in a Teapot (she once shared my commercial space) pack and handle the details of moving out of the Bay Head, NJ studio, gallery and store. It was uncomfortable & the right choice. This space had been the fulfillment of years working towards a dream. I was in Florida social distancing, maybe not being there made it easier!
After a few months, found my way again. Using a house exclusively as my work space, not as a home, offered new creativity along with a way to work in a healthy environment. Offering just a limited number of photo sessions; in many ways it was going back to my roots. I started my home based business as new mom over 36 years ago! So along with family, maternity, newborn and underwater portraits…
Milk bath portraits
We offer several photo session options beginning at just $250. Sessions are spaced with care and giving every client privacy with social distancing. This a way to pamper yourself while creating a gift for someone special
Our Luxurious Milk bath wearing Lee Richards Jewelry
Milk Bath Portraits are stunning.
Perfect for women of all ages
romantic
boudoir
ethereal
florals
elegant
maternity
newborns
mother/child
babies
mermaids
young women
women with life experiences
it is personal
the past few months
The spacing of clients sessions with social distancing care for maternity & newborn sessions - I realized something
I was one of the few special people involved with my families, helping them in a unique way!
It was my oldest daughter, a NICU nurse, who suggested I consider becoming a postpartum doula..
“mom, you have always supported women and it is something mother ‘s really need, you already are great at this!”
I took the ProDoula certification course, already had CPR certification!
So portrait photographer and doula., Life can be exciting, open to new ideas and possibilities especially when you allow yourself to be yourself.
Jersey Shore Doula Services
This services, for now, is combined with Susan J Roche fine art portraits. This feels authentic for the time being. As the services grows, it may change. My thoughts right now is to create a wonderful way to help mothers.
Eventual we may, as more know about JSDS, we may add additional doulas. With two RN’s available via phone as added support, our goal is to provide an enriching business for moms, families and doulas!
inspired - what does amazing look like
write down ways being amazing looks like in your own life
Then think about ways for you to embrace being your definition of
Amazing
Love the movie title Becoming Jane.... Becoming me
Becoming Me
Growing up in a large family, I was never alone. As the forth child of eight, we grew up sharing bedrooms, hand me downs, someone to play with, to help and be helped by, taking and giving to one another (sometimes stealing, telling on). Loved being part of and hated it, too.There was always someone to talk with, count on, share with, fight with, be judged by and then as mom declined, they were gone.
This year has offered new ways to create a healthy life that feels inspired and full.
My stay at home began in Southwest Florida. Certainly an isolation; one that allowed time daily for art and thinking. This may sound funny - kayaking alone on the river each day gave way to discovery and soul searching that broadened my world.
The acceptance of unmet goals and dreams, along with a gratitude for my path inspired peace.
Maybe this is just what comes with age.
Come September, I will celebrate my six decades of birthdays. Mother of three good people, I did my job pretty well. ‘Grammy’ to four little darlings and, in time, maybe few more will arrive. I have been a daughter, sister, friend, girlfriend, wife and other labels, too. Been through heartbreaks, betrayals, and I have broken hearts and betrayed others, too.
these adorable little one are my grand children
In my twenties, thought I knew so much - life, relationships, parenting, everything. By my mid thirties, thought if I worked hard enough, it could still be accomplished. As a young mother life changed rapidly; my father diagnosis just when I was pregnant again ( somethings I had given up on) and his passing two weeks after my son was born - love, loss and renewal. As the next decade came and went, it taught me that the decision to try to keep my children’s needs foremost meant my goals were about them. If I kept running I would not feel the unfulfilled parts of me. Raising children who knew love was my goal along with running small little photography business. I learned it is not always possible to work hard enough, choices need to be made. Still tried to be perfect, it did not work. At 42, my twenty year marriage was over.
In 2011, turned fifty, decided my mother needed my help. This experience changed me again.
It is kind of funny looking back… the only word for it is devastation.
Mom had memory challenges. My siblings (seven of them) and I experienced this differently. Maybe nothing can prepare you for the loss of your mother. This pain surprised me. Then, Superstorm Sandy flooded my business and my home. This happened as my mother and my siblings were no longer part of my life.
Growing up in a large family, I was never alone. As the forth child of eight, we grew up sharing bedrooms, hand me downs, someone to play with, to help and be helped by, taking and giving to one another (sometimes stealing, telling on). Loved being part of and hated it, too. My siblings helped form my view of the world. My friends, the people we played with, were in part due to my relationship with my siblings. I wanted to fit, to be part of, to be love by, to be thought of as special.
In third grade, I lost an invitation to a neighbors birthday party and was devastated because my sister told me it meant I could not go (she was also invited). As a teenager, remember thinking my older brother would like who I was going on a date with because he would like his car. Truthfully, my older brother did not care. I just wanted to to be accepted. In a large family there was always someone to talk with, count on, to copy, to tell you what to do and think, be responsible for, share with, fight with, be judged by and, as mom declined, they were all gone.
So now… it is 2021 and I have learned to be me. Not as a mother, sister, daughter, or something, just me.
Closed a studio, gallery, store in April with Covid, it was the right time. Now only create work I am passionate about.
I want my life to bring goodness into the world.
Do I have ten, twenty, thirty years or more years left of creating goodness in the world? Is it possible to have more?
So this year I am sharing
An Inspired Life - journal for thinking, dreaming and discovering with daily thoughts
IG underwaterportraitphotography - water inspired portraits both under water & in the tub
IG susanjroche - things i like
I Love You, I'm Sorry, Please Forgive Me, Thank You - Simple Steps to Healing: Ho'oponopono
It is a good time to think about goodness
Hoʻoponopono is a Hawaiian practice of reconciliation and forgiveness
It is more time at home even though it would be wonderful to be planning a Hawaiian vacation… keeping ourselves safe while honoring the people in our lives this holiday season is important. Sometimes it can be difficult to be at home feeling a bit stagnate or challenged, I thought maybe reading about goodness. It could be helpful.
Ho’oponopono
defined in the the Hawaiian dictionary
(a) "To put to rights; to correct, revise, adjust, amend, rectify, tidy up make orderly or to make ready, as canoemen preparing to catch a wave."
(b) "Mental cleansing: family conferences in which relationships were set right (hoʻoponopono) through prayer, discussion, confession, repentance, and mutual restitution and forgiveness.”
Literally, hoʻo is defined as goodness
Ponopono is defined as to correct
Hawaiian scholar Nana Veary in her book, Change We Must: My Spiritual Journey wrote that ho'oponopono was a practice in Ancient Hawaii.Ritual of Hoʻoponopono corrects, restores and maintains good relationships among family members and with their God. The process begins with prayer.
I love you. I'm sorry. Please forgive me. Thank you.
(a) "To put to rights; to correct, revise, adjust, amend, rectify, tidy up make orderly or to make ready, as canoemen preparing to catch a wave."
(b) "Mental cleansing: family conferences in which relationships were set right (hoʻoponopono) through prayer, discussion, confession, repentance, and mutual restitution and forgiveness.” referring Hoʻoponopono teachings.
In the book, Zero Limits, Dr. Ihaleakala Hew Len shares that Ho’opononpono cured the criminally insane patients without him ever seeing any of them. This is based on Len's idea of taking responsibility for everyone's actions, not only for one's own.
If one would take complete responsibility for one's life, then everything one sees, hears, tastes, touches, or in any way experiences would be one's responsibility because it is in one's life.The problem would not be with our external reality, it would be with ourselves. Total Responsibility, according to Hew Len, advocates that everything exists as a projection from inside the human being.
Simple Steps to Healing: Ho'oponopono
I Love You, I'm Sorry, Please Forgive Me, Thank You
The story about a Dr Luw that the psychologist would study an inmate's chart and then look within himself to see how he created that person's illness. As he improved himself, the patient improved.
I have always believed that I am responsible for what I think and do and that most people think this way. We're responsible for what we do, not what anyone else does.
Hawaiian therapist named is Dr. Ihaleakala Hew Len worked at Hawaii State Hospital for four years, he never saw a patient, he only looked at their files. That ward where they kept the criminally insane was dangerous. While he looked at those files, he would work on himself. As he worked on himself, patients began to heal.
"After a few months, patients that had to be shackled were being allowed to walk freely," he told me. "Others who had to be heavily medicated were getting off their medications. And those who had no chance of ever being released were being freed, ”I was simply healing the part of me that created them," he said.
According to Dr. Len
Total responsibility for your life means that everything in your life – simply because it is in your life – is your responsibility. If you take complete responsibility for your life, then everything you see, hear, taste, touch, or in any way experience is your responsibility because it is in your life.
This means that terrorist activity, the president, the economy – anything you experience and don't like – is up for you to heal. They don't exist, in a manner of speaking, except as projections from inside you. The problem isn't with them, it's with you, and to change them, you have to change you. This idea is “new age.”
Yet ho'oponopono means loving yourself. If you want to improve your life, you have to heal your life. If you want to cure anyone – you do it by healing you.
According to the Doctor, all he did was repeat to himself
I'm sorry, I love you, Please Forgive Me, Thank You
Dr. Len suggests a four-stage process for this ho'oponopono work. Whenever a place for healing presents itself in your life, open to the place where the hurt resides within you. After identifying this place, with as much feeling as you can, say the below four statements:
I love you.
I'm sorry.
Please forgive me.
Thank you.
There is challenge in my life, I am giving this try. Silently I am saying, "I'm sorry,'“ "I love you,” “Please forgive” and “Thank You.’
I do not know what will happen here. Whatever happens I hope love will be part of it.
